Holy Joy

Welcome to Word for the Week, the series in which I:

share my experience of hearing God’s Word in Mass last weekend,
explore what I believe the Lord is calling me to do about that Word, and
ask how this Word might impact your life, as well.

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At long last, we chose a home parish! Here's the caveat: we decided to settle into this parish for one year and then reassess. That seems to be the best I can do right now.

So there we were, at our home parish, two Sundays ago. And I was feeling queasy. As I've been sharing here on my blog, I've been recovering from an eating disorder.

I ate breakfast before Mass, but I felt lightheaded and out of sorts during the liturgy. The word that stood out to me was from the opening prayer, the collect. I found the text on a website for the Diocese of Fort Worth (thanks, Texas!):

O God, who in the abasement of your Son
have raised up a fallen world,
fill your faithful with holy joy,
for on those you have rescued from slavery to sin you bestow eternal gladness.
Through our Lord Jesus Christ, your Son,
who lives and reigns with you in the unity of the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever, amen.

Holy joy. Whenever I hear "joy" in the scripture, I take it personally (because Joy is my middle name)! As Mass went on, I continued to feel ill. Eventually, I left to eat part of a protein bar.

When I returned to the pew, David whispered that he thought I could still receive the Eucharist because it was a medical need. "But I broke my fast," I protested. So at Communion, I approached for a blessing only.

After Mass, I waited in line to speak with our pastor. He sat down with me at the back of the church, after all of the other parishioners had departed.

It was such a comforting conversation. He already knew about my recovery process, but I explained how it is hard to know how to fast these days.

"You're caught in a shame cycle," he accurately summed up how I was feeling.

"Yes! But if I wasn't doing this to myself then I wouldn't even have this problem and then I could fast!" I tried to pinpoint the issue, with tears in my eyes.

Our pastor was able to help me see that I am doing my best right now. Ultimately, David had been correct. In effect, this is a medical condition and it's okay to treat it as such.

I was able to receive Communion after Mass! As the week went on, I thought about the words "holy joy," and about another bit of wisdom from that conversation with our pastor.

To paraphrase, he said, "It sounds like you think you need to get better on your own. No, God calls us to holiness but He is the one who is going to accomplish it for us."

God's the one who makes us holy. I love that. And He is certainly ushering in change right now that I couldn't have planned or predicted. Oh, by the way: turns out I had the flu last week, in the end.

So I'm grateful to be feeling better, and grateful that the flu allowed for these moments of grace with our new pastor in our (official) home parish.

What about you? Can you see the hand of God orchestrating change in any aspect of your life, where you wouldn't be able to summon up change on your own?

Kind of like when the Israelites stood at the foot of the Red Sea; they needed a miracle. God made it abundantly clear that it was He who parted the waters for them. What's the Red Sea in your life today?

Let's pray: Lord, as we stand at the water's edge, like the Israelites at the Red Sea, we know you are calling us further into your love and mercy. Please part the waters and we will walk through. Thanks for hearing and answering us before we even ask. Amen!

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Dick Safranski
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Kate Hicks
Deacon Tim & Lily Roberto
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Frances Jones
Elizabeth Herberg

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Mourning ➡️ Gladness

Welcome to Word for the Week, the series in which I:

share my experience of hearing God’s Word in Mass last weekend,
explore what I believe the Lord is calling me to do about that Word, and
ask how this Word might impact your life, as well.

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Last Sunday, I was in the beautiful Sedona, Arizona. Red rock mountains surrounded the church where I went to visit for the weekend. It was a "high desert" experience of Arizona.

The final Mass of that day was in Spanish. My Word for the Week resonated. "¿Dónde está, muerte, tu victoria?"

(There are some Matt Maher song lyrics that I really like, with the line, "Oh, death, where is your sting?" I think that's the direct translation of this verse.)

For some reason, over the course of this week, I haven't been able to recall this word, however! Even when I've entered into specific times of prayer, I couldn't remember the passage.

Now that I'm sitting down to write this entry, it's dawning on me again. (I looked through the Spanish-language readings from last Sunday until I found it, in 1 Corinthians.)

It's incredible to experience how the Lord speaks! I see Providence in forgetting this word until now. Because it's been such a joyful week. I've sensed the victory of the Lord—who triumphs over death—in my life this week, even when I forgot the words of the victory chant.

Even with the start of Lent, it's been a joyous moment. A few days ago, I said, "Happy Ash Wednesday!" to a friend, and she said, "Do we say that?"

We do! In fact, Ash Wednesday of 2009 was the happiest day of my life: the day David proposed to me! We got engaged with ashes on our foreheads. And ever since, we've seen how God changes our "mourning into dancing." To quote Psalm 30:11 a bit further:

"...you took off my sackcloth and clothed me with gladness."

What sackcloth of yours needs to be changed today? Is there something weighing you down, or dampening your joy? Maybe the Lord is calling you to let him transform it into gladness.

There is certainly much cause for mourning in our world today: death, destruction, and a more distinct general awareness of mortality. Yet, God is convicting my heart. He who made us from the dust, can turn our experiences of death into new life again.

Oh death, where is your sting?

Let's pray. Lord, come change our mourning into dancing. We give you permission to transform even the sadness of our life into joy in you. Give us courage to enter in your rest, Lord. Amen!

P.S. This topic reminds me of the theme of our We Should Pray podcast: "...prayer changes tragedy into comedy." So I'll invite you to listen to the latest episode of the show, or to watch it on YouTube!
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Special thanks to VIP Patrons:

Dick Safranski
Jordan Mendez
Julian Padilla
Jessica Cook
Kate Hicks
Deacon Tim & Lily Roberto
Carrie Brzezinski
Frances Jones
Elizabeth Herberg

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What Brings Joy to the Heart?

Welcome to Word for the Week, the series in which I:

share my experience of hearing God’s Word in Mass last weekend,
explore what I believe the Lord is calling me to do about that Word, and
ask how this Word might impact your life, as well.

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Warm sunshine, crisp turning leaves, a cool breeze off of Lake Eerie: the setting was exquisitely autumnal at St. Joseph Parish in Avon Lake, Ohio two Sundays ago. As I joined in singing with the congregation at Mass, the psalm response spoke to me, “The precepts of the Lord give joy to the heart.” The message lent confidence to the many times the Word of God broke through in subtle and not-so-subtle ways over the course of the week.

I was scheduled to fly home from a 10-day tour last Monday afternoon. But I was so fatigued that I became physically ill on Sunday night before my concert. Thankfully, I was able to sleep in my rental car for a while (since my lodging was an hour from the church), and then catch a second wind by being “on stage” in front of a live audience. Adrenaline—a gift!

The message from my body was coming in loud and clear. It was time to rest! I begged the Lord to show me how to reverence my body with the rest I needed. As I packed up to fly back to the Southwest, I realized maybe there would be a departure the next day.

After some brief research, I was able to use travel vouchers to adjust my flight. I learned I could keep my rental car until the following day at no cost, as well! Plus, my friends graciously consented to host me another night at their home.

As I sat in their sunroom last Monday afternoon, I was surrounded by towering trees outside of the windows. Sunlight streamed through the branches and a brook babbled down a hill nearby. Psalm 23 came to mind.

Upon my return to Arizona the following day, my friend Paige picked me up from the airport. What a comfort to be greeted by a familiar face and to verbally process on the drive home! I rehashed what had been one of my most challenging tours to date: especially with some new unknowns in ministry, I felt short on vision for the future.

As we drove down the highway, Paige described how she had sifted through some prayer cards before she picked me up; she had asked the Lord what He might want to say. Paige explained, “The card I chose said, ‘Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding.’ So, I’ll just add that for whatever it means in relation to what you’re sharing.”

“I don’t see how that applies at all here, Paige,” I said sarcastically. We both laughed.

There were a lot of other moments that the Lord blessed me with the gift of joy last week though His precepts. But I’ll close with a couple of verses from Psalm 23. Will you join me in asking the Lord, “How does this word apply positively to my life?”

In green pastures he makes me lie down; to still waters he leads me; he restores my soul....
You set a table before me in front of my enemies; You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. Indeed, goodness and mercy will pursue me all the days of my life; I will dwell in the house of the LORD for endless days. (Psalm 23:2-3, 5-6)

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Special thanks to VIP Patrons:

Dick Safranski
Jordan Mendez
Julian Padilla
Jessica Cook
Kate Hicks
Sara Chacon
Deacon Tim & Lily Roberto
Carrie Brzezinski
Frances Jones

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Holy Joy!

Welcome to Word for the Week, the series in which I:

share my experience of hearing God’s Word in Mass last weekend,
explore what I believe the Lord is calling me to do about that Word, and
ask how this Word might impact your life, as well.

---

My word for the week is “holy joy." The words stood out in the opening (“collect”) prayer at the start of Mass. It was hard to contain my emotion as the full congregation joined in song together. This past weekend our Bishop reinstated the Sunday Mass obligation, and the full pews reflected the change.

4-yr-old Serra helped keep me from being too elated! Although her exuberance was heartwarming, like when she spontaneously danced through some of the songs, there was a lot of redirecting throughout Mass!

“Serra, don’t hit your chin on the pew!”
“Serra, please don’t hold your blankie up in front of other people.”
“Only speak in a whisper, okay?”

On one occasion, I could hardly keep from laughing aloud at her antics. We were all kneeling. I was singing with my eyes closed. Suddenly, I felt the abrupt sensation of hair against my teeth! I opened my eyes to see that Serra had sneakily picked up some of my braided locks and put them in my mouth for a moment while I sang.

Her wide eyes and mischievous grin were too much for me to correct at that point.

As I asked the Lord what He wants me to do about this word, holy joy, I admit I’ve felt mostly overwhelmed. Many things are falling back in place now as the world reopens, such as concerts on my calendar, and travel plans that don’t get cancelled. But in the same way that staying home all of the time was a major adjustment, it feels like an exhausting task to switch our entire schedule and mindset again. “Am I doing this wrong?” I wonder.

Are you familiar with this passage: “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” -Matthew 11:28-30

(Sitting with the Lord in silent prayer for a couple of minutes as I write this.)

What came to me is that Jesus instructed us to pray, “Give us this day our daily bread.” And so, the Lord is allowing my needs each day. When I feel weary and burdened, He’s allowing that, too. And He is ready to give me His yoke, and his burden, in place of my own. 

If you’re feeling similarly today—weighted down with responsibilities of one sort or another—maybe we’re in the right place, after all.

P.S. I just noticed that I only focused on the first half of my Word for the Week. It turns out that every time “joy” is mentioned in the Bible, I take it personally because Joy is my middle name. My question this week has been, “How do you want me (Joy) to be holy this week, Lord?” 

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Special thanks to VIP Patrons:

Dick Safranski
Jordan Mendez
Julian Padilla
Jessica Cook
Kate Hicks
Sara Chacon
Kelly Wesaw
Deacon Tim & Lily Roberto
Carrie Brzezinski

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Joy, Joy, Joy + Go, Go, Go

Welcome to Word for the Week, the series in which I:

share my experience of hearing God’s Word in Mass last weekend,
explore what I believe the Lord is calling me to do about that Word, and
ask how this Word might impact your life, as well.

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{Disclaimer: I’ve shared openly about overcoming a 3-year experience with Postpartum Depression! Still, I work vigilantly to foster healthy mental patterns now that I’m past that season of life. In today’s “Word for the Week,” I’m going to describe some of that process. I believe mental health is a crucial part of being a healthy individual.}

My sister, Veronica, and I parked in the side lot of the church. There were a dozen cars. I fished a black piece of fabric from my purse pocket and studied it in my hand for a moment. Then, with a resolute sigh, I stretched the cloth with both hands to secure the loops around my ears. My family has dual enrollment; at our other home parish, masks are optional. This was about to be my first time wearing a mask throughout the entire Mass. It was more challenging than I imagined.

There were plenty of humorous moments to balance the internal struggle. For instance, when we arrived, the greeters extended hand sanitizer to us instead of the hugs and the holy water that we normally receive. Also, the sound of 45 people attempting to sing hymns through cloth coverings? That was mostly hilarious until the lack of air became a problem. I realized it’s not going to be safe for me to sing with a face mask. Mostly, Mass felt like a circuitous mind game!

First, was gratitude to be back at church. Followed by anxiety that I wasn’t getting enough air. Then, the idea would arise to slow my heart rate by taking a deep breath. Yet each time I tried to take a deep breath, I instinctually reacted as though someone had their hand over my mouth. That wasn’t helpful. So I would pray harder, and focus on the wonderful fact that I was back in church! Gratitude would resume.

The Word continued to speak even in the midst of my attempts to stave off a panic attack. It was a 3-fold word, this time! First, it was “...speaking about the kingdom of God.” (That’s how Acts 1:3 describes what Jesus did with the apostles after His resurrection.) Then, it was “joy, joy, joy” and “go, go, go.” Those words were repeated in that order in the psalm response and in the offertory hymn (based on Matthew 28:19), respectively.

God is calling me to speak about the kingdom *right now*! And to be myself while I’m at it! #JoyIsMyMiddleName—Looks like social media is the way. So I may or may not need to become that Catholic mom/big sister on TikTok very soon. :0)

Do you need encouragement to proclaim the joy of the kingdom of God today? Here’s some! I learned from Catholic apologist Steve Ray that while John 11:35, “Jesus wept,” is often referred to as the shortest sentence in the Bible, it’s actually 1 Thess 5:16, “Rejoice always!” Because, according to Steve, “the first (verse) has 13 Greek letters but the second has only 12 Greek letters.”

So I’ll invite you to consider with me that even as Jesus weeps with us, He calls us to rejoice. And that's something worth speaking about.

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Special thanks to VIP Patrons:

Kim Moline
Dick Safranski
Jordan Mendez
Julian Padilla
Jessica Cook
Kate Hicks
Sara Chacon
Kelly Wesaw
Deacon Tim & Lily Roberto
Carrie Brzezinski

To become an Amanda Vernon Patron and receive exclusive rewards, signup at amandavernon.com/patron.